Author Archives: Jill

Infidelity Investigation

Spying On A Lover

If you have your suspicions that your partner is having an affair, but for your own peace of mind you need to be sure about the infidelity, investigation is an option but, before you go out and hire a private investigator, make sure that you know what you are getting yourself in to. There is no doubt that infidelity is one of the hardest things anyone ever has to go through and the period when the first suspicions develop is one of the worst. The not knowing, […]

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Infidelity, Spying Is NOT Revenge

Spying On A Lover

Do not use what you find on your cheating spouse as ammunition for revenge. Sure, you may have wonderfully violent fantasies of what you would really like to do to him/her and the other person. This is very normal. But, don’t act them out. Using what you find to extract revenge will only lengthen the time of pain and anger. It will undermine your integrity as a person, lower your personal standards and make you exceedingly unattractive. Resist the temptation to sling the mud! Keep what you […]

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Infidelity, How My Marriage Made Me Do It

Signs Of A Cheat

Ask someone why they had, or are having an affair and you may hear something like this: “I have a lousy marriage. My marriage is dead. There is no intimacy, no sex, and no excitement. The love is gone. We’ve grown apart. I can’t stand the marriage. There was nothing happening in the marriage and the affair just happened.” These statements are rationalizations and fail to “get at” the underlying issues. Key points: 1. It’s as if a marriage is an animal gone bad. A marriage does […]

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Cheating Spouse, Is Spying An Invasion Of Privacy

Signs Of A Cheat

My, how the cheating spouse cries foul when he/she discovers you are spying. Outrage can be intense: “How dare you!! I never thought you would stoop to that! How could you!? How can there be trust in this relationship if you do that? This is none of your business; I don’t spy and go behind your back! Now you know why I want to pull away from you. How could I love anyone that would do something like that to me?” On and on. Cheating husbands and […]

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Emotional Infidelity, A KEY Tactic To Save The Marriage

Surviving An Affair

Hearing that your cheating spouse is “in love” with someone else is devastating. I hear often, “I can handle her having sex with someone else. I think I can live with that. But, for her to give herself emotionally and “love” someone else…man, that is hard.” (Feel free to substitute the word he for she in this article.) What can you specifically do to increase the odds of saving the marriage? So often the offended spouse reacts with intense feelings and pulls out all stops to “win […]

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Relationship After Cheating, Will It Survive…Maybe

Surviving An Affair

The relationship after cheating has occurred is not a cozy place to be. Can it go on? Will it survive? Do you want it to continue? Obviously, each party in the relationship will have their own ideas about what to do and what not to do. If you are the person who cheated, you, of course, will get the brunt of the blame (even if there are other factors that lead to you cheating). If you made a mistake but you do want the relationship to continue, […]

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Cheating Husband Or Wife

Spying On A Lover

When you spy on your suspected cheating spouse, please make sure you consider all the possibilities you might encounter and whether you can handle them. Have you considered the many situations that spying might uncover? Can you imagine the worst thing you might find? Predict what your response will be to the worst-case scenario. Are you ready? Here are some specific questions to ask: 1) Do I have friends I can count on for support if I discover the worst? Do they know I might need them? […]

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Signs Of A Cheating Spouse

Signs Of A Cheat

The signs of cheating can vary for each individual. Some people are just plain better at deception than others. If you have a suspicion that your spouse may be secretly hiding an affair with another individual whatever you do do not confront your mate. Confronting your spouse can possibly make the affair harder to prove because they will go to even greater lengths to hide what is really going on. Instead, go over the list of signs and if your significant other is showing or has shown […]

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7 Legitimate Motives for Spying

Spying On A Lover

Should you spy on your cheating husband or wife? You believe you see signs of a cheating spouse. The need to know whether your spouse is cheating and EXACTLY what kind of cheating is taking place is often strong. There are a number of reasons why the drive to spy is powerful. Here are seven: 1. Trust is a big reason, not of your partner, but yourself. Probably for some time you have sensed something is different or questioned the change of behavior in your partner. Perhaps […]

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Characteristics of the Adulterer

Surviving An Affair

“I Want to Get Back at Him/Her” is one of 6 kinds of affairs I outline in my E-book. This is the “revenge affair.” It occurs in a marriage in which one feels slighted in some manner and seeks revenge by engaging in an affair. It is less a movement toward the other person and more a movement away from one’s spouse. The offending spouse usually lacks the skills of personal confrontation or is frightened by the prospect of someone “getting upset.” When evaluating this kind of […]

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